Xenoblade Chronicles Smash Taunt
by SubspaceWarrior
Summary: An idea I've been working on since long before Shulk himself was even announced. These conversations are a Xenoblade-themed equivalent to the Snake Codecs and Palutena's Guidance. Shulk and his companions discuss Shulk's opponents. If there's popular demand, I may make second versions with Fiora activating the conversations! This is just for fun, so please enjoy!
1. Mario

**Conversation 01: Mario** (01/58)

 **Dunban** : Shulk, do you know who that Homs is that you're fighting?

 **Shulk** : Of course! That's Mario, is it not?

 **Dunban** : From what we've heard about him, he's the most popular of all the Smash Bros. fighters. In fact, he's actually very, very famous outside of Smash, as well.

 **Shulk** : Heh. To fight the most famous of all the Smash fighters. Glad I decided to do research on him first.

 **Dunban** : Indeed. The idea of fighting someone like him would certainly give his opponent the opportunity to become a celebrity themselves.

 **Shulk** : C-Celebrity?!

 **Dunban** : I'm sorry, but did I get you flustered? If so, then my humblest apologies. I didn't think you would react like that, Shulk.

 **Shulk** : No, I'm fine, Dunban. I just didn't expect to hear that word from you.

 **Dunban** : Even if I was hailed the "Hero of the Homs"? You'd probably have a better shot at Mario than I ever could.

 **Shulk** : Okay. But if I was to get the Smash Ball, I'll call you and Riki to the scene.

 **Dunban** : In that case, I'll gladly help you.

 **Next Conversation** : Donkey Kong


	2. Donkey Kong

**Conversation 02: Donkey Kong** (02/58)

 **Reyn** : Whoa! Check out that guy Shulk is fighting! He's big! ...And hairy!

 **Dunban** : It appears you're talking about Donkey Kong.

 **Reyn** : "Donkey Kong"? ...Pfft! Bwa ha ha ha ha! What kind of name is that, Dunban?

 **Dunban** : ...In spite of his comical name, Donkey Kong is not a fighter you should underestimate. In fact, he is indeed as strong as his appearance suggests.

 **Reyn** : Yeah, I see. Tell me what you know about this ape, Dunban.

 **Dunban** : Donkey Kong is a fighter who rightfully earned his title "King of the Jungle". He is also fond of bananas. Much more than I ever could.

 **Reyn** : Yeah. Such a shame that his world's bananas taste better than ours.

 **Dunban** : *ahem* Back to Donkey Kong. You may have heard about an ancient battle between him and Mario, correct?

 **Reyn** : You mean at an old construction site?

 **Dunban** : Yes. That Donkey Kong is actually this Donkey Kong's grandfather.

 **Reyn** : Interesting! Does this Donkey Kong get along with Mario?

 **Dunban** : More or less. They're still competitive every now and then. And Smash is amongst the many competitions.

 **Reyn** : Guess Shulk is amongst their new opponents. At least the both of us know who to root for. Am I right?

 **Next Conversation** : Link


	3. Link

**Conversation 03: Link** (03/58)

 **Reyn** : Hey, Shulk! Who's that swordsman you're fightin'?

 **Shulk** : That's Link, Reyn. He's the one who earned his title "Hero of Hyrule".

 **Reyn** : Guy doesn't talk very much, does he?

 **Shulk** : Not really. Anyways, did you learn anything about Link?

 **Reyn** : Well... What info about Link I did get was shoved into my brain courtesy of ol' Square-tache.

 **Shulk** : Oh ho ho, really? The Colony 9 Defense Force Colonel? Well, what did he tell you about Link?

 **Reyn** : More like "what did he yell me about Link?" Anyways, the first weapons that comes to mind regarding Link are his Master Sword and Hylian Shield. However, he's got more to it than that.

 **Shulk** : Really?

 **Reyn** : Yep. He has the old bow-and-arrows combo, he has a boomerang, some bombs, and even a Clawshot. Which Link can use to grab edges or foes.

 **Shulk** : Yeah. Sounds about right.

 **Reyn** : But I gotta say... How did ol' Square-tache learn about Link so quickly?

 **Shulk** : Umm... maybe it was due to my invitation to Smash? Anyways, I better get back in the fight. See ya later, Reyn!

 **Reyn** : Hey! Wait! Shulk! You didn't answer my-! Aaand... he's gone again.

 **Next Conversation** : Samus


	4. Samus

**Conversation 04: Samus** (04/58)

 **Sharla** : Now that's quite the gal that Shulk is fighting.

 **Reyn** : Huh? Slow down, Sharla. Did you just say that Shulk's opponent... is a girl?

 **Sharla** : Well, of course, Reyn. Homs anatomy allowed me to tell what her gender is. And I haven't even seen what she looks like underneath that suit by that point.

 **Reyn** : Homs anatomy, huh? I was wonderin' why the waist was so slim. Heck, that thing couldn't even fit me.

 **Sharla** : That's because that Power Suit was designed for Samus herself.

 **Reyn** : Samus? That's her name, Sharla?

 **Sharla** : Of course. Samus has been through a lot. She was orphaned at an early age when she lost her parents to Space Pirates. She was raised by the Chozo, and learned their fighting arts.

 **Reyn** : Loss of family... That's something that all of us, possibly save for that furball, could relate to.

 **Sharla** : Yes. But no matter how scary things get for our bounty hunter, she soldiers on. And with an arm cannon like that, I can tell how she made it this far.

 **Reyn** : Agreed. But we came here to root for Shulk.

 **Sharla** : Hopefully Shulk would show good sportsmanship, regardless of who wins.

 **Next Conversation** : Kirby


	5. Kirby

**Conversation 05: Kirby** (05/58)

 **Melia** : That's a rather cute fellow that Shulk's fighting.

 **Riki** : Kirby may be squishy and soft, but Riki softer! ...Riki not squishy, by the way.

 **Melia** : Oh, hey, Riki. Tell me what you know about Kirby.

 **Riki** : Kirby hail from world called "Pop Star". Kirby's hobbies include eating and sleeping. Just like Riki.

 **Melia** : Oh, really? I wonder how Kirby can fight well, then?

 **Riki** : Kirby have special ability, to copy other fighters' moves!

 **Melia** : Oh? As in a Copy Ability?

 **Riki** : Melly right! For example, if Kirby copy Shulk, Kirby gain Monado and Monado Arts.

 **Melia** : Riki, are you serious?!

 **Riki** : Riki hear all information from Chief Dunga.

 **Melia** : We've got to inform Shulk about-!

 **Riki** : Melly, no need be hasty! Be happy! Melly free to stroke Riki's fur for match while cheering Shulk.

 **Melia** : I suppose you're right, Riki. ...It's like whenever the opportunity presents itself, I always go for it. Good luck against Kirby, Shulk.

 **Next Conversation** : Fox


End file.
